Al-Rehab "Secret Man" Alcohol-Free Concentrated Perfume Oil (Crown Perfumes)

Probably the least talked-about Al-Rehab perfume oil out there is this one, "Secret Man," and for good reason: it's incredibly mediocre stuff. But like most of these, it rips off a very popular fragrance, in this case Tommy Girl by Hilfiger. If you like whitewashed, fruity tea-florals, then you might enjoy Secret Man. Then again, why wear an inferior clone when the original is still in production, and cheap to begin with?

The problem with Secret Man isn't even that it clones a popular nineties designer feminine, but that it conveys the citrus-sweet and floral-tea structure with shampoo-grade aroma chemicals. It smells like a fancy shampoo. There are hotels in Vienna (I stayed at one) that stock shampoos and soaps nicer than this, actually. So wearing Secret Man sends an unfortunate message - "I've showered using cheap hotel soap, and sadly cannot afford a better hotel."

The notes are aldehydic blackcurrant and lemon, green tea, jasmine, sandalwood, and musk. The blackcurrant note is identical to that used in Silver, and the jasmine is fairly close to the clean-sheen jasmine of Tommy Girl, so recognizing the influence is easy. The sweetness of the top accord flattens the tea note in the middle, which subsequently smells rather mute. Eventually Secret Man gets woodier, and dries down to the same musk that the rest of my Al-Rehabs exhibit. Not terrible, but disappointing, the smell of a man whose only secret is his good taste.

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