These eBay Sellers SUCK!

What a Rip-off!

Ebay is both a blessing and a curse for a fraghead. I use it almost exclusively for my purchases (Fragrancenet and Amazon for the rest), and I've always had good luck with it, but that's because I'm lucky. It's not uncommon for people to get scammed by shifty bats, and this article is intended to highlight the ways a Creed buyer can get ripped off.

Let's start by taking a look at the picture above. This is a listing by a merchant who enjoys the company of a cadre of like-minded assholes that I call the "Red-Liners." Many Creeds are packaged in opaque bottles that obscure their content levels, which makes it tough to know how much product you're getting by a photo alone. This prompts merchants to Photoshop red fluid level lines over the bottles, which is itself no bad thing. My problem isn't with the line; I object to the price. It isn't commensurate with the amount of fragrance being sold, and it almost never is. In the picture is a bottle of Silver Mountain Water that is down a full ounce, as indicated by the red line, yet the merchant prices it at $245, which is $25 more than Fragrancenet is asking for full bottles of the same size. This one has no box or cap, and the price is way, way too high -- it should be no more than $180. 

Then there's this listing, for a bottle that ostensibly includes a box, but no cap. The bottle is legit, and the box probably is too, but here's the problem: the atomizer is aftermarket. Not just the nozzle, either, but the entire atomizer unit, from the crimping on the neck all the way to the nozzle itself. No generation of Creed atomizer ever looked like this, and it's clear that someone removed the original atomizer, refilled the bottle with something other than SMW, and then attached this crappy unit on there, hoping that it looks close enough to the old firehose sprayers of yesteryear. This guy wanted a typical eBay Creed price for this thing, and it's clearly been tampered with. The kicker -- the bugger sold it! 

Above we have what I like to call a "Flashlight Bully." Instead of using the red line, he opts for the flashlight approach, shining it from behind the bottle to make the fluid level visible. Again, I have no problem with people doing this, and actually prefer this approach to the red lines, because at least I can actually see with my own eyes how much juice is being sold, which removes a layer of doubt. The price isn't super offensive, although I feel it's about ten bucks too high. My issue is with how this product is listed and described -- the seller cites the condition as "brand-new" and "unused," yet there's clearly about twelve mls missing. In the description, "Approximately 97/100 ml remaining." Uh, no. That's not three ml, and the item has obviously seen some real use. Nice try.

In these three screenshots we see a listing by "Sketchy Bottle Guy." These guys always post super janky-looking bottles with bizarre deformities that the seller never attempts to explain. The top photo shows a Green Irish Tweed with a strange white area on the upper neck, which looks rather like someone tore the black finish off the glass while trying to pry the atomizer off. The next picture shows what we're meant to think is the same bottle with the atomizer sprayer removed to reveal the white plastic ring characteristic of genuine Creeds, but there's one problem: it isn't the same bottle, which is obvious because this one has no white area by the neck and collar. Clearly a visual misdirection. The last photo shows the bottom of the bottle, and maybe I'm being nit-picky here, but the stamping of "Made in France" looks a bit strange. That's neither here nor there given that the previous two pictures show a fragrance with enough red flags to attract every bull in Pamplona. 

Here we have a listing by a "Fake Boxer." These guys have a little cottage industry going where they crank out these full-production fakes, with graphic print boxes that Creed has never made, with awkward-fitting plastic caps that Creed would never use, and with bottles covered in cheap acrylic that cracks by the lettering, a feature that no genuine four-ouncer ever had (let us be thankful for the little things). But for their trouble, these jerks expect buyers to fork over $400+, mostly because they peddle the supposedly "vintage" 120 ml bottle size, which eBay has automatically deemed worthy of pricing north of $450. They tend to target SMW, Aventus, and Viking the most, so if you see these fragrances with weird graphics on their boxes, or some sort of box "sleeve," run, don't walk. 

And last but not least, we have a listing by "Coffret Guy," the eBay merchant who wants you to believe that at some point Creed made 1 oz mini-me bottles of its three hottest masculines and sold them together in a little gift set. While the box is admittedly well made, Creed never produced anything of this sort, and it's as fake as a porn star's bosom. Close scrutiny of the bottles reveals that they're merely clumsily-made chromos in a humorously diminutive size, meant to represent "travel Creeds," and again, Creed offers 50 ml bottles for a reason: they travel. The 30 ml size has always been an entirely different bottle design, not a smaller version of the 120 ml size. 

Other things I often see: listings asking full retail for bottles that are seven hundred years old, or close to it. This is perhaps forgivable with something like Bois du Portugal or a well-kept GIT, but steer well clear of buying deep vintage Millesime Imperial, Silver Mountain Water, and Green Valley. They age like milk, and spending anything more than $50 on 120 mls is highway robbery. I guess I could see spending a little extra for an older 120 ml bottle of vintage "Imperial Millesime" in gilt gold, just for the cool bottle, but I wouldn't pay any more than $100 for it. 

Also be wary of the larger size decanters, the 8 oz or even 17 oz flacons, as they were never factory sealed, and it's no difficult thing to simply take an empty one and fill it with whatever. This brings me to the reason you never want to use counterfeit perfume: you simply don't know what you're spraying on yourself. It could be cheap but harmless cologne, or it could be battery acid. You have no way of knowing. If you're in the market for a genuine Creed, or any expensive niche frag, and you want to buy off eBay, know what you're after. Study the product. Familiarize yourself with the little manufacturing quirks, the things a company always does, sometimes does, and never does. Read everything, look carefully at every picture, and ask for more. If they decline to send more, pass. 

There are the "One-Pic Guys," those who list a Creed with one lone picture of the actual bottle, and nothing else -- no atomizer pics, no lot code pics, no box/packaging pics. They annoy me. Some of the bottles are probably legit, but why not post a thorough rundown of the product? Multiple pictures means business; one picture means funny business. And in closing I'll mention the "Stock Photo Guys," the eBay merchants who list all of their Creeds with company web images from twenty years ago, or generic Photoshopped (often blown-out) images, without showing buyers the actual bottles that will be sent upon purchase. 

Steer well clear. Buyer beware!